This is also part of my 4 night stretch adventures.
The small birds outside my window drove me absolutely crazy.
This scene with Zooey Deschannel captures my sentiment precisely!!!
Showing posts with label lunacy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lunacy. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Friday, December 7, 2012
Friday night misadventures in pajamas and barefeet
I did not work today, in fact I am considering this my last weekend for a long time to come (maybe even until I retire) and I planned on relishing it. My in-laws were out of town until tomorrow, so it was going to be a quiet night in.
Today I ran some errands, made up some holiday gifts, went to the gym, faxed papers for the real estate agent, and ended my day with a subliminal bath complete in a jetted tub.
In my pajamas I curled up on the couch with a stack of comic books - the Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes. Life was excellent. The dingoes asked to be let out so I let them out and then headed to the garage to grab a beer to accompany my comics.
Mango and Marley the cats were out there and made a dash for the door between the house and the garage. I instantly closed it to keep the girls out of the house. Then of course, like the cogs in a machine painfully becoming unstuck, I realized in horror that I had locked myself out of the house entirely. In pajamas. Barefoot. Without a cell phone. And it's 35 degrees F outside. %$#@!
So, I did the first logical thing that would avoid embarrassment
Option 1: I grabbed the ladder and went out the back yard in the dark where the dogs were and attempted to set up the ladder beneath my bedroom window. One of my windows was open today and I thought perhaps I could access it on the second floor. On my way to the window of course I stepped in dog poop. Great. I'm in pajamas, barefoot, and now I smell terrible.
My ladder was definitely long enough though to reach the window! The ground, however, was dangerously uneven. I seriously considered climbing it regardless of the risk. It did seem worth it to perhaps have the cops called on me for breaking and entering. Then I thought , 'Wouldn't it be ironic if I end up as a patient in the ICU where I'm supposed to start work on Monday?' Thankfully that sobering line of sanity shook me up enough to make me explore my other options.
Option 2: spend the night in the garage. This seemed like the completely logical option in comparison to being embarrassed of course. So I washed my feet and began hunting for blankets or anything that could keep me warm inside the garage. I think at this point my feet were numb, too. I found pink insulation, 2 cats that were not interested in cuddling, and a toddler's trampoline. Oh, and I found a painter's jacket. I did put that on because being in my pajamas and all, well, cold weather and female anatomy are just not decent in these situations! Let me tell you, I'm so thankful I had pajama pants and top on (as opposed to a nightgown only) or else I would have never considered option 3. I would just have opted for hypothermia instead.
Option 3: After my fruitless hunt I had to face the inescapable, humiliating fact that I was going to have to find someone to help me. I vetoed the neighbors on either side of the house because their lights were off. Plus, I couldn't ask to use their phone since in today's era of cell phones the phone number recall portion of my brain has atrophied and the only other family member in town happened to be out of town too. My best bet was walking to mayor's house because at least he had my family's phone numbers in his cell phone.
Walking barefoot on the streets (mind you there are very few side walks here) with the threat of goatheads (see previous post Botany Lesson #2) was rattling. I had considered wearing the ski boots that I had seen in the garage, however, I thought that might make people less likely to help me since I might look like a bit of a lunatic in ski boots, pajamas, a painters jacket, and my wet hair looking like a dandelion.
Somehow I did not get a single goathead lodged in my tender soles. I rang the door bell and simply said, 'I locked myself out!' and attempted to look like a lost little puppy. It worked ;). The mayor and his wife were thankfully having a beer when I arrived and invited me, served me a couple beers, shared great conversation, drove me home, and unlocked the door!
What a night. Now I can get back to my comic books.
Today I ran some errands, made up some holiday gifts, went to the gym, faxed papers for the real estate agent, and ended my day with a subliminal bath complete in a jetted tub.
In my pajamas I curled up on the couch with a stack of comic books - the Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes. Life was excellent. The dingoes asked to be let out so I let them out and then headed to the garage to grab a beer to accompany my comics.
Mango and Marley the cats were out there and made a dash for the door between the house and the garage. I instantly closed it to keep the girls out of the house. Then of course, like the cogs in a machine painfully becoming unstuck, I realized in horror that I had locked myself out of the house entirely. In pajamas. Barefoot. Without a cell phone. And it's 35 degrees F outside. %$#@!
So, I did the first logical thing that would avoid embarrassment
Option 1: I grabbed the ladder and went out the back yard in the dark where the dogs were and attempted to set up the ladder beneath my bedroom window. One of my windows was open today and I thought perhaps I could access it on the second floor. On my way to the window of course I stepped in dog poop. Great. I'm in pajamas, barefoot, and now I smell terrible.
My ladder was definitely long enough though to reach the window! The ground, however, was dangerously uneven. I seriously considered climbing it regardless of the risk. It did seem worth it to perhaps have the cops called on me for breaking and entering. Then I thought , 'Wouldn't it be ironic if I end up as a patient in the ICU where I'm supposed to start work on Monday?' Thankfully that sobering line of sanity shook me up enough to make me explore my other options.
Option 2: spend the night in the garage. This seemed like the completely logical option in comparison to being embarrassed of course. So I washed my feet and began hunting for blankets or anything that could keep me warm inside the garage. I think at this point my feet were numb, too. I found pink insulation, 2 cats that were not interested in cuddling, and a toddler's trampoline. Oh, and I found a painter's jacket. I did put that on because being in my pajamas and all, well, cold weather and female anatomy are just not decent in these situations! Let me tell you, I'm so thankful I had pajama pants and top on (as opposed to a nightgown only) or else I would have never considered option 3. I would just have opted for hypothermia instead.
Option 3: After my fruitless hunt I had to face the inescapable, humiliating fact that I was going to have to find someone to help me. I vetoed the neighbors on either side of the house because their lights were off. Plus, I couldn't ask to use their phone since in today's era of cell phones the phone number recall portion of my brain has atrophied and the only other family member in town happened to be out of town too. My best bet was walking to mayor's house because at least he had my family's phone numbers in his cell phone.
Walking barefoot on the streets (mind you there are very few side walks here) with the threat of goatheads (see previous post Botany Lesson #2) was rattling. I had considered wearing the ski boots that I had seen in the garage, however, I thought that might make people less likely to help me since I might look like a bit of a lunatic in ski boots, pajamas, a painters jacket, and my wet hair looking like a dandelion.
Somehow I did not get a single goathead lodged in my tender soles. I rang the door bell and simply said, 'I locked myself out!' and attempted to look like a lost little puppy. It worked ;). The mayor and his wife were thankfully having a beer when I arrived and invited me, served me a couple beers, shared great conversation, drove me home, and unlocked the door!
What a night. Now I can get back to my comic books.
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